Van Helsinki: Before the Storm is a fanfiction posted on It tells of the end of the mission Van Helsinki  went on before he was dispatched on the Loren Case. Inspector Someone-Who-Is-Not-David-Bowie also makes an appearance.




Van Helsinki enters his hotel room after a case, apparently related to an Albulka who he has 'finished', but is ambushed by several waves of goons. Eventually, his gun jams and he is forced to flee via the window. Van tries to drive away, but his Porsche car is destroyed by 'Vladimir', and he is captured. The henchmen are ambushed by Sophia, with a sniper rifle, and as 'Vladimir' attempts to drive away, Van crashes the car, badly injuring both of them. The two face off, but Sophia intervenes and kills 'Vladimir', though Van blacks out. Van wakes up in hospital, and has a meeting with the Inspector, where he is told that his next case is the Loren Case.

Connection to the original scriptEdit

  • Van's next case has to do with Esme Loren, which the original script in the flashback scene, reveals is Mr. Loren's wife.
  • Van's Glock jams on him in this story, perhaps preempting his use of a M1911 in the film.
  • Van is told by the Inspector to use more guns. In the film, he uses eight different ones.
  • Van carries his Glock in a shoulder holster. In the film, he uses a shoulder holster for his M1911.
  • Van's 'darling Sophia' might be one of the broken hearts Geoff Vampire mentions in the film.
  • Van Helsinki: The Second Epilogue implies that Before the Storm was set in Egypt.